You have probably been in a situation in which someone tried to talk to you and you really didn’t feel up to it. Often, you feel the need to act like you’re interested so you don’t jeopardize an important relationship. In most cases, you simply need to look like you are listening. If that is the case, use these tips to help you get through those dreadful conversations.
Use non-verbal Communication You can use nonverbal communication to show you are listening by maintaining eye contact. Eye contact is a key part of showing someone you are paying attention and listening. Studies have shown that eye contact is one of the most important things you can do to show acuteness (Studies here).
You can also express nonverbal communication by nodding your head and showing a relaxed posture to show you are comfortable and concentrated.
Encouraging words to show understanding (even if you don’t understand). When speaking to someone, try to cut some time in when the speaker is taking a breath by stating words such as:
- “Really?!”
- “Whoa…”
- “NO.”
Remember, tone is very important to show that you are being attentive, not negligent and rude. When saying even the most simple words such as “yes,” you should have an open attitude to show acknowledgment and understanding.
Repeat or paraphrase This shows you are actually listening even if it is a very dull discussion. When you repeat something or put in your own input, it could possibly make the other converser feel respected.
Body Language Is the most important step to show you care. For example, when you have your arms crossed and your body facing the opposite direction as someone, it makes it look like you are angry or unmindful. Whereas standing or sitting up straight and facing your body towards them shows attentiveness. Now, if you don’t care about being unmindful and will do anything to get out of the situation, then feel free to make your body language as closed-off as possible.
Time to end Opportunities may present themselves to finally end the conversation. So take them, whether it’s a lame excuse about your father’s college roommate’s lizard, it doesn’t matter. End your suffering. If you want to take a more polite excuse, you could say something similar to, “Well, it’s been great talking to you. I should probably go.” Then finally you are free to go about your life until the next horrific conversation.
