Women have fought long and hard to be treated with equality. Because of this fight, girls growing up who are passionate about this topic often hear the common yet degrading sayings that are filled with misogyny and reek of missing the point: “Are you sure you can handle this?,” “Let me help you with that,” and “That’s a boy’s job!” Those common sayings are definitely sexist, but they also have a silver lining if you look close enough–a way to subvert them if you will.

Making the patriarchy work for you is not about looking weak and fragile but more about letting a man fulfill his need to be seen as masculine while you get to sit back and let him take care of your heavy lifting. This installment’s example of working smarter not harder is as follows:

“Yeah, you’re right… This is too heavy!” This is a response to a comment doubting your capabilities as a girl. Instead of arguing back with the boy, let them think they’re right and carry the 10-pound object for you! Remember, this isn’t about looking weak: this is about getting out of doing something because you simply don’t want to and the boy is too blinded by his misogyny to see what’s happening.